


I see you wherever I look

by Roosterbytes



Category: Septiplier - Fandom
Genre: Grief/Mourning, M/M, it's sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-09
Updated: 2015-12-09
Packaged: 2018-05-05 19:19:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5387336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roosterbytes/pseuds/Roosterbytes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For some people, it will always be too soon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I see you wherever I look

**Author's Note:**

> The anniversary of my Nana's death is coming up. And I've wanted to write something like this for a while but just never had the words to. I read a story a few days ago and it mentioned the name of someone whose death I still haven't mourned, nor accepted. I have a hard time dealing with death, as this story kind of explains and reading that story opened up old wounds. The time and dates of this story have meaning to me, as does a few other little things.
> 
> So, I needed to get some of the sad out so I could continue writing other things.

There's soft breathing beside him and Mark allows himself a moment to bask in it. The shallow breaths of his lover sleeping beside him almost lulls Mark back to sleep. But instead, he sits up and allows the fog of sleep dissipate from his body before turning to face the sleeping form.

Jack had forgone the covers again, instead sleeping ontop of them. His hair is messy and wild, matching the state of his clothes and the bedsheets beneath him. His face is so peaceful that it tugs at Mark's heart. If he thought he could kiss Jack without breaking the moment, he would've. A soft smile pulls at his lips, as sadness settles deep in his eyes.

He doesn't want to leave Jack's side but he has to go record at the Grump space. It's 7am afterall.

When Mark leaves the bedroom, he catches a glimpse of the calendar. _August_.

 

The drive to the Grump space is long. There's tons of traffic and despite the beautiful sunny morning, Mark cannot help but feel glum. He'd rather be at home with the love of his life, snuggled under the covers instead of sitting in traffic behind some asshole who can't drive.  
Fuck the- Mark stops his thought and checks the dashboard. _77 degrees Fahrenheit. Tuesday, September 22, 2015_ is written across the display. Yeah, fuck the 77 degree weather. He'd rather be at home with Jack.

 

Mark can't seem to record properly. His rhythm is all messed up and he can barely muster enough energy to do his intro. Not to mention his phone keeps going off. Jack really should know better then to text him while he's trying to record. With a sigh, Mark gives up. He slides off his headphones and shuts down his computer.

The Grump space is mostly empty, save for Kevin and Arin. The two look up from their work at him before sharing a glance. Kevin goes back to his work while Arin stands up and walks over to him.

"You okay man?" There's concern underlining his words but Mark waves a dismissive hand at it.

"Yeah. I don't think I slept all that well. And Jack keeps texting me, so I should probably head home." Mark mumbles, running a hand through his hair. 

"Mark-" Arin begins, a deep frown set on his face. There's worry etched into his skin as he places a shaky hand on Mark's shoulder.

"There he is again. Irish bastard." Mark chuckles, holding up his phone. The home screen shows no messages and reads _7:00am Wednesday, August 3rd, 2011_.

"I've got to go. Can't keep an Irishman waiting." Mark gives a half smile while Arin's frown deepens and he furrows his brow.

"Okay.. See ya man.." Arin calls out as Mark walks away.

 

Mark doesn't remember the drive home but soon enough he's opening the front door, kicking off his shoes and settling onto the couch near Jack who's shouting at the television. Mark smiles, listening to the shouting that echos off the walls. It's funny how a sound so loud could be so soothing. Mark's eyes flutter shut and he briefly catches a glimpse of the silver bands around his neck.

 

When Mark wakes up, he feels more tired than he had when he'd fallen asleep. Which is funny considering that's the longest sleep he's gotten in years. A yawn falls out of his mouth before he sits up and acknowledges the quietness of his home. It takes a moment for him to register the day's events before he jumps to his feet and dashes to the bedroom. The bed is empty.

Mark runs a hand from his collar-bone to his shoulder, before feeling metal against his skin and hearing a clink. He grips the object in his hand and lifts it over his head. Two silver bands lay against his bare palm and he feels tears well in his eyes.

"Jack.." Mark hiccups, clutching the bands in his fist, before holding them to his heart.

"I didn't get to say I love you, one last time." Mark sobs, sliding to his knees. 

"I never got to say goodbye.." Mark howls, arms against the floor as he hunches over himself.

There on the nightstand, is a picture from their first anniversary. And in the drawer, is Jack's obituary, dated _Wednesday August 3rd, 2011 at 7am_.

**Author's Note:**

> Edit : So this has confused many people so I wanted to explain it.
> 
>  
> 
> _I had a feeling it would be confusing. It's kind of like when you look at something, say a snow globe or a bracelet, and remember where you got it from and the memories attached with it. It's like that. Beside him on the bed reminded him of where Jack slept. He's still stuck on the day Jack died, unable to mourn the loss of his love while the rest of the world has moved on. He's unable to focus on work because he no longer has interest in it and instead gets lost in the memories of Jack. When he comes home, he's reminded of the many times he'd come home and heard Jack's yelling. And the rings on the necklace remind him that Jack is gone._
> 
>  
> 
> I hope this helps.


End file.
